Ah ohh, tired? Go get some sleep. But no honey, sleep is not going to help you when it’s your soul which is tired. Is it getting worse? Or we just get used to it. Sometimes we get stuck at the point of life where life hasn’t left any choice for us. We try and try hard to get out of it. But life has its own plans to trap us over and over. And then.. we stay still, we start fighting with ourselves, become restraint, become trapped, feel so helpless because there’s nothing we can do to make things better. It breaks us into pieces, we become very pensive and anxious.
But sweetheart, its okay! It’s okay to stay still when things happening around are not in your hands. No matter how hard the lemons are thrown at you, you have to survive and its okay. Already everything sucks then why not you just take care of yourself. It’s okay to being a part of anxiety, its okay to being alone. Stop worrying about people, as you were born without them, you can live without them. Its okay to choose yourself on priority, being a little selfish by denying someone over you for your peace of mind, its all okay.
Its okay to lock yourself in room and cry out loud, to burst. Its okay to feel unwanted sometimes, to not being noticed by people. It’s okay to bunk your class sometimes and just go to seek your san junipero. To spend your sleepless nights on the rooftop in the moonlight watching those adorable stars, getting that thunder of the wind on your face and trust me that bise is damn magical, getting the feel of the entire universe. To just sit down and see the beautiful colors of sunset and wondering are they really this magical! To go and watch the windmill which is just reminding the cycle of your life. To just laying down on the bed and staring at the ceiling and do nothing whole day. Its okay to take some time and love yourself first.
Sometimes its really fine to do what you want to do, whether its wasting your time, its okay, whether its wrong for others, its okay. Doing things which gives you a little happiness in your hard times, is what you should do because you at least deserve it. Just accept all your flaws. We all have our own reasons, it’s the phase and you are going to heal soon. Life is too short to be worried so be who you were, before all that stuff happened that dimmed your fucking shine.